I wish I could just connect my brain to my computer and just purge out all my thoughts onto my blog. It's such a bother to cram all my thoughts into squiggly letters and make sentences. At least I wish I could just talk and my computer would type everything for me. There probably is a program out there that would do that. hmmmm.... There is something I spend a ridiculous about amount of money on.

As Morpheus said in The Matrix 1, "Time is always against us." And in my case as usual I should probably go to sleep but I just wanted to see if I could squeeze some of my thoughts out before I hit the sack. Right now I'm having this reoccurring feeling that I have once in a while. It has to do with having too many worlds in my brain. My visual image of this feeling takes the form of a kind of collage or mosaic of all these people inside of my head talking about their views on different topics. No, I'm not hearing voices. :-) That's just the picture that comes into my mind. There is something perplexing, mysterious, troubling and intriguing about how we all live on the same planet together but each culture (not to mention subcultures within cultures) is so wrapped up in itself and often truly believes it is the only one reality. I often experience this tangibly through simple exchanges with my students. And it really trips me out sometimes. It goes something like this, I'm working with whatever culture-it may be Spanish or Korean or whatever and we are having a conversation about nothing special. Then one of us will say something that suddenly makes me realize in that moment that even though we are standing right next to each other and have some pretense of knowing each other really we are worlds apart.

However, after a while even though I might not agree with the perspective of whichever culture I'm living in their view starts to seep into my brain. I begin to understand them to some extent. I begin to have a duel brain. I can see a situation form their point of view and also from my culture's point of view. But then I travel some more and then more. Soon many ways of seeing the world have seeped into my brain and it amazes me because I understand each of them and yet I know that each one thinks they are "the only way" of seeing the world. It's not quite as confusing as it may sound because I know what I think in the sense that I have a core worldview, Christianity, that acts as a grid and guide for what I experience. It's not that I don't know what I think; it's just that I feel like I sometimes have so many worlds in my mind. When you live in another country long enough or talk with a certain culture enough it's like their perspective leaks into your veins. But what is perplexing and sometimes almost laughable to me is that I sometimes feel all these views or empathies live in my brain but they all believe they are so totally the only truth. For example, I feel I can really understand the Korean mind sometimes. Perhaps I can even think like them even though often I choose not to. Then I go to America and I can think like them, too. I also know that they often think their way of thinking is the only way. I can understand both these ways of seeing the world. They both live in my brain but in so many ways they are so contradictory. So in that way, sometimes I feel there so many ways of seeing the world whirling in my brain that I think my brain is going to explode.

Um, that was way too hard to express! I'm going to bed. :-)